There should be absolutely no restrictions on what order you do any of the steps you mention.
If the board is failing to program, especially as this is an off the shelf development board, you need to examine the hardware - the board, the ByteBlaster and all the cables.
If you have access to any other programming hardware I suggest you try that. If not make sure all the connections are sound - no contamination in any of the cable connections.
Has this board ever programmed reliably? Is the power supply to the board delivering the right voltage? Is there another fault on the board that is causing it to draw too much current from your supply, thus lowering the supply voltage?
Regards,
Alex